Lewiston school Superintendent Jake Langlais injures knee
That’s unfortunate and all, but come on, Jake. We’re going to need to know how you suffered this injury. Was it related to krav maga or kick boxing in your backyard? Or was this some kind of gardening injury? If you fell down while trimming your toenails or something, you might as well fess up. There’s no shame in admitting getting injured in a less-than-macho way, you know. OK, there’s a little shame in it, which is exactly why we need to know.

Abyssinia, Henry
If I seem less than myself lately, it’s because I recently watched the MASH episode in which Col. Henry Blake is killed on his way back home. A thousand times, I’ve seen that episode, and a thousand times it got to me. Poor Radar. Poor Hawkeye. And poor me, when you get right down to it, because I’m just not a Col. Potter fan and B.J Hunnicutt is no Trapper John. Oh, well. At least I can go on knowing that Frank Burns is still around.

Ridin’ with Goggles McGee
It has been reported to me by no less than TWO people that a motorcycle has been spotted around town with a dog riding pillion on the back. Wearing goggles, was this dog, which makes that motorcycle rider about the coolest dude in the whole greater Lewiston area. I have no way of knowing if the dog’s name is really Goggles McGee, but I really like to think it is. Gosh, I hope so.

Lewiston Mayor Cayer won’t seek second term
This is bad news for me. Not only has Mark Cayer been absolutely great about responding to my needy, off-hours questions over the past couple years, he is the first that I know of who’s name actually RHYMES with “mayor,” and that’s something I’ve been waiting my whole career for. With Cayer gone, I’m going to hope that ’70s singer Leo Sayer moves to Lewiston to take over and frankly, I’m not a fan.

Pole position
Every time I go to Walmart these days, I have to resist a powerful temptation to drive straight into that yellow and/or green pole in the parking lot just to see what it feels like. There MUST be some magnificent joy in it, otherwise people wouldn’t be slamming  into it, right? I mean, I see no other reason to drive into that pole in broad daylight. It’s gotta be some kind of buzz and by gum, I want a taste of that.