Thomas Vinal Barrows

FARMINGTON – On the 30th day of July 2023, Thomas Vinal Barrows left this life, leaving behind a large, loving family and many cherished friends. Over the preceding eighty years, “Big Tommy Barrows” proved himself to be, at heart, a family man, with a deep well of drive and determination. And the friends and family he left behind, first and foremost his lifetime companion and wife of 62 years, Joyce Lander Barrows, deeply and sincerely share this profound loss. A native of Farmington, Maine, Tom himself was no stranger to struggle. He and his three sisters, Carolyn Pratt, Barbara Martin and Nancy Kading lost their mother Marion to multiple sclerosis when they were young. For years before her final departure, he witnessed her struggle with that terrible and debilitating disease. But it was in Marion’s heartbreaking fight that Tom forged both a rugged determination and the reverence for family that he held fast every day. He married Joyce, his childhood sweetheart, shortly after they graduated from Farmington High School in 1961. Soon after, these two young people welcomed their own child, Holly Marion, a namesake of his beloved mother. Determined to provide for his new family, Tom worked his way through college earning his degree from Husson University in 1966, while Joyce worked and cared for their new family. Tom’s struggles through school were recognized when he was later appointed to the Husson Board of Trustees, a perch he then used to award yearly scholarships to select students of Mount Blue Regional School District. On graduation, Tom took a job with Shell Oil Company – an outfit he treated as his extended family for the rest of his career. For close to four decades, Tom pursued his career in the Shell family with postings from New York, to Florida, Ohio, Louisiana and Texas, as he rose the corporate ladder. And on that journey, his family continued to grow. He and Joyce had their beloved daughter Becky in 1966, now a teacher in his hometown of Farmington, and a dear son Matt born in 1972 in Fort Lauderdale, himself now a father of three. But at the end of the day, Tom was not just a family man—he was a Mainer. And it was to Maine he came home. Tom spent his youth roaming the shores of Clearwater Pond, outside Farmington. And again, it was family that sustained him there. Those shores were studded with the camps of his family and his boyhood was filled with their joys. The Austins, the Dingleys, the Morrills and the Barrows. Everywhere there was family, to lend a hand and to keep a watchful eye. In the nineties, Tom staked his own claim to the shore of Clearwater Lake, acquiring his own piece of waterfront from, fittingly, another family member. He named his camp Marion, after his mother, and prominently displayed on the mantle a picture of his father Clyde, both of whom he would honor by continuing to support MS Chapters throughout Maine. When finally after decades of hosting his children and grandchildren, the years told him it was time to let the camp go, it went to his first grandson and his own family. Out back, he built a smaller camp for himself and Joyce, christening it Camp Elsa, after Joyce’s mother. Tom Barrows was a proud family man, and he left behind a large and grieving family. Foremost, his wife, Joyce. His daughter Becky, whom he adored. His son Matt and wife Kim, and their three children, Austin, Abbie and Mia. And his daughter Holly Bacarisse, with her husband Louis, their three children, Nick, Sam and Bonnie, and four great-grandchildren, Aviva, Clara, Clyde, and Felix. And he’d never forget Happy, his devoted canine companion. Tommy was a loving and generous husband, father, grandfather, brother, uncle and friend but he was also a fighter. Perhaps he took that from his mother as he watched throughout his childhood her brave fight against MS. In his last days, Tom fought his own battle with a debilitating foe. It was a battle valiantly fought, but one he saw he would not ultimately surmount. It was then, ever determined, that he turned to his family and pronounced himself ready, lovingly saying to them to steel their own resolve: “Okay, let’s get this show on the road.” And so he did. A memorial service will be held at Henderson Memorial Baptist Church in Farmington Maine on Saturday, Aug. 19, 2023, at 10 a.m.

Arrangements are under the care of Dan and Scott’s Cremation and Funeral Service 488 Farmington Falls Road, Farmington.