Bag Lady and Shopping Siren are all about the hunting and gathering.

Hunting good deals. Gathering cool wares, or wears, as it were.

Sure, our ancient ancestors had different ideas for “hunting and gathering.” But then, they didn’t have Marden’s.

Here we have super Marden’s.

Just a few weeks old, the Marden’s in the former Walmart building near the Maine Mall is reportedly the largest one in the state — 119,000 square feet filled with toys, clothes and housewares, as well as loads of fabric for sewing and upholstery, a ton of carpeting, tile and flooring and lots of furniture that seemed, to the naked eye, to have fewer dings and dents than furniture at other Marden’s stores.

The store was bare as far as decoration (many walls still sported the Walmart blue) but it was well-laid-out, with obvious departments and shelves that had some order to them. That said, it is Marden’s, so there were still plenty of chances to dig through displays and paw through racks, all for the thrill of discovery.

We were instantly smitten.

• Wrought-iron house decor, assorted prices

Overheard: Little boy to mom, “This is the big-stuff aisle.”

Right on. Giant clock? Giant star? Giant easel? Check. Giant prices? Not even.

• SCI Cuisine Internationale cookbook holder, $2.99

Fun gift for a chef. Because in that extra half-second it takes to lean over the cookbook, your pot can boil over, your souffle can fall and your chicken can burn. Precisely why we have the pizza place on speed dial.

• Coleman tent nightstand, $7.99

Inflatable, with storage inside and checkerboard on top. Seen for several dollars more down the street at Goodwill, so this was a deal. If, you know, you really feel you need a nightstand while camping.

• Charleston Fine Home Furnishings cottage towel rack, $29.99

Classy rack with white shelves, pair with Kensington hook shelf. Let each of your beaus have their own robe hook. We won’t judge.

• Orbit Dripmaster 3-piece set, $3.99

Butterfly, lady bug and dragonfly sprinkler trio with tubing and irrigation set-up. Like the camping nightstand, these were more expensive at Goodwill, so another point for Marden’s.

• Komboze Little Miss Matched sheets, $11.99/full, $14.99/queen

White with purple polka dots and green trim. Or, jungle orange and pink. Very I-don’t-take-myself-too-seriously.

• China Dolls girls’ shoes, $6.99

OMG. Red, covered with beads — more adorable than the ones that Dorothy wore. Or go green, or yellow garden party. Attending a baby shower soon? These will get the most ooohs.

• Women’s shoes, various brands, sizes and prices

OMG again! For some reason this Marden’s appeared to be the center of the high-heeled universe. Nine West, Lacoste, Enzo Angiolini — you name the brand and this store had a high heel to match. Mind, sometimes not in a good way. (Exhibit A: Bordello black, white and red boot heels with buttons up the side and a zipper, size 11, $22.99. Supposed to look like a modern take on spats. If spats came in 6-inch ankle annihilators.)

• Hanes Stepz fishnet knee highs, 99 cents

Pink or black. When you’re feeling just one-quarter racy.

• Star Wars 3-D tie fighter kite, $10.99

This kite had a wing span of more than 3 feet. More than 3 feet! Kite! Star Wars! We’ll just be over here jumping up and down like 5-year-olds.

• Elijer toilet, $69.99

In case we weren’t clear: This Marden’s has everything. Even French-sounding loos.

• Tulle, various colors, 50 cents/yard

Meshy fabric in nearly a dozen colors, including blue, green, purple, white and several shades of pink. Make a tutu for every day of the week.

Best find: General Electric light bulbs, various sizes/styles, 50 cents to $1

Two four-packs of dining-room light bulbs for a buck? It’s almost criminal.

Think twice: Trafficmaster faux-carpet tiles, $18.59/box of 14 tiles

Let’s be clear: These are not tiles of carpet. They are vinyl tiles — or vinyl-esque — imprinted with a Berber carpet image. So you don’t get the feel of carpet. You don’t get the look of tile. You just get … something that should be neither hunted nor gathered. Ever.

* Prices as of 6/22

Bag Lady and Shopping Siren’s true identities are protected by a pair of stylish, sweater-wearing Doberman pinschers (who are out swimming; just leave a message at the beep) and the Customer Service counter at the Sun Journal. You can reach them at baglady@sunjournal.com and shoppingsiren@sunjournal.com.